Today marks the first anniversary of my dad’s death. It’s hard to believe that an entire year has passed already. I wanted to share with you the following poem that my sister penned this week. It will give you a glimpse into our last year. Blessings, friends.
A Journey Through Grief, A Promise of Hope
by Suzanne Fitzpatrick Nunnally
A beautiful Monday in the heart of spring,
Such peace in my heart, full of thanksgiving.
I told the Lord, “Life is perfect, please let it stay.”
No idea what would be changed by the end of the day.
Through random circumstances we had a clue
That something was wrong; in our hearts we knew.
And at the scene, it was confirmed to be him.
My dad was gone, and this nightmare begins.
The first few days pass by with a blur.
Friends and family surround you, give you strength to endure.
I want to wake up from this nightmare, I say.
It can’t be true, I will wake up some day.
But each day, each moment, the truth hits again,
My dad, my greatest friend, is gone to Heaven.
And so this journey with grief, it starts to take hold
The loss and the pain will lessen we’re told.
I want time to stop, but move fast just the same.
I long for a time when I can breathe again
But the farther I go, the longer it’s been
Since I saw him, hugged him, breathed him in.
The world keeps on moving, as if all is the same,
But inside I scream “Stop!” I can’t play this game.
Don’t people know that I’m not okay?
That this pain and the grief don’t just go away?
My faith starts to shake, I’m angry, it’s true.
I needed my dad, and I know God knew.
But just when my faith starts to break, I can take no more,
God gives me a hope, like never before.
God promises always to work for our good.
My mind can’t contain what He understood.
His plan is much bigger and broader than mine.
He weaves it all together from the beginning of time.
And yes, the hole in my life is great and wide,
But God promises always to be by my side.
I cried out to God, said I needed my dad.
He said, “I’m the best Dad you’ve ever had.”
So hold me, my Daddy, please don’t let go.
Walk with me through life, and I will know
That even through loss and sorrow and grief,
You love me, sustain me, secure my belief.
And even though joy is shadowed with pain.
Our loss on this Earth is Heaven’s gain.
I rejoice in the promise I’ll see him someday
When I’m fully alive in Heaven to stay.